English / Family / Parenting / Thoughts / Women

Not all mothers are created equal

Between the outpouring love in the form of gifts, breakfast in bed or on the table, I want to pay attention to children whose mothers are not as loving as mothers should be.

Those children don’t feel like sending their mother a card like this. 

  
Image is taken from Freepik.

Those characters described above belong to mothers. Mothers ought to be lovely, funny, wonderful, unconditional, sweet, kind, incredible. They show nothing than praising traits. This is the idea of a mother in the society. 

However not all mothers are created equal. There are manipulative, evil, envious, jealous, malicious, undermining, selfish mothers. Some could be rather abusive as well.

Mentioning mothers as such is unheard of. It is a taboo acknowledging that kind of mother, the one who gave birth to you. Mothers are supposed to represent all the positive adjectives existed, aren’t they? People with a loving mother can’t even imagine others who do not maintain good ties with theirs because of that. 

That’s why I write this post, to support children (young and old) of loveless mothers on this Mother’s Day. I am fully aware what they are going through today, craving and yearning for a loving mother. Seeing the updates of picture perfect happiness on social media must be hard. Or it leaves them cold cause they have never experienced how it is to live and be raised by a loving mother.

Those who are lucky enough for having a caring and loving mother, cherish her. Those who don’t, I think of you today. I genuinely hope you get someone who subtitutes this. Someone who is not your biological mother but the one who is able to provide you the care and love.

42 thoughts on “Not all mothers are created equal

  1. Pernah baca buku A Child Called It Mbak. Dan bahas sama temen soal itu. Sang Ibu kan kayaknya kejam banget. Gak nganggep Dave ini. Beda sama perlakukan ke yang lain. Kami berdua memutuskan masih gak bisa menjawab “kenapa” sang ibu begitu.

  2. Dua paragraf terakhir bikin terharu deh, mbak… having lived without knowing my mother personally (she passed away when I was only 9 days), every Mother’s Day has always been a pain in the behind for me because I have to see the abundant love people give to their moms. Even though now I also have a mom, it’s still not the same because she’s not the “real” one, if you get what I mean. So yeah, I hope you also stand with motherless children (young and old) who have not got the chance to know their real moms.

    • Wah Crystal, I didn’t know that. I somewhat can imagine the wondering, what ifs etc concerning your biological mother.

      Of course I think of children like you who never know/never have a chance to meet their mother. Hug!

  3. Happy Mother’s Day, yen. To those kids who have never had loving mothers as I send prayers to them, hoping that they could learn love from different way.

    and also to us who have children that have furs and feathers😉

  4. Mba yo, jarang ada orang yang berfikir seperti yg mba yo tuliskan diatas( memikirkan perasaan yg tidak sempat merasakan kasih sayang ibu) apalagi di jaman sosmed ini. Semua pada upload foto bareng mamanya. Lalu apa rasanya bagi mereka yg ga sempat merasakan kasih sayang ibu? Nice post mba. As always.

    Happy Mother’s day to you.

    Happy

    • Aku kok dua minggu lalu mikir ke anak-anak (muda atau dewasa) yang ngga berhubungan baik dengan ibu mereka Jo makanya nulis ini. Intinya menyampaikan bahwa ibu ngga semuanya sempurna dan karena Hari Ibu yang makin heboh di social media dan makin komersial offline, gimana perasaan para anak dari loveless mothers. Kasian dan simpati sekali aku sama mereka.

  5. Happy mother’s day Mbak Yo…

    semoga anak-anak yang tidak mendapatkan kasih sayang dari ibunya mendapatkan kasih sayang dari orang yang menganggap mereka seperti anak sendiri, aamiin

  6. A “mother” does not have to be a biological mother. The definition of a true mother goes far far beyond that. But indeed the sad reality is that not all children get this kind of privilege of having a true mother.

  7. Aduh Mbak, aku kok ngembeng bacanya. Nggak pernah kepikiranku begitu, meski aku udah lebih bisa memikirkan kalau mengenai yang belum punya anak. Aku tadi di jalanan jadi mikirin, beberapa temenku ternyata juga ada yang begitu, hubungan dengan ibunya tidak ‘senormal’ dan ada yang ibunya juga sudah nggak ada.
    “I genuinely hope you get someone who subtitutes this” Amin, Mbak. Dan semoga kalau dia perempuan dan punya anak, bisa mendapat kesempatan memberikan kasih sayang ibu.
    Selamat hari ibu buatmu juga, Mbak Yo.

    • Simpati dan empati ya ke mereka yang ngga merasa kasih ibu. Dan di satu sisi aku juga mikirin loveless mothers gitu Ndang. Kenapa mereka punya anak ya? Ini pertanyaan yang susah dijawab.

      Makasih dan selamat hari ibu juga.

  8. mbak yoyen, I belong to the group that you think of (though I am a mother now) and thank God I get the substitute from my only daughter who gives me unconditional love. I am lucky enough I guess🙂 thank you for the touching post mbak.

  9. Kmarin di FB ada berita seorang anak 9th yg harus mengemis buat bayar utang ibunya yg sudah meninggal dan dia di “asuh” tetangga yg ngasih hutang ibunya itu. Sekarang dia sudah tinggal dirumah penampungan dan soal tetangga yg ngasih hutang dan nyuruh dia setor duit min. 50 rupiah perhari itu entah diapain ga da beritanya. Tulisan yg bagus sekali mbak Yo seperi biasanya.
    Happy Mother’s day to you

    • Makasih sharingnya Ru. Waduh, sedih sekali ceritanya ya, anak umur 9 tahun kena imbas utang ibunya. Kok tega masih ditagih keanak seumur gitu.

  10. happy mothers day mbak walau dah telat ya, gara-gara tulisan mbak yang ini “Those who are lucky enough for having a caring and loving mother, cherish her” aku jadi ingat ibuku, memang banyak yg lebih baik dari dia tapi biar bagaimana aku tahu dia sudah banyak berkorban untuk aku.
    ikut berdoa buat semua anak dengan ibu yang tidak/kurang sayang dan peduli semoga mereka tetap bisa merasakan kasih sayang layaknya kasih ibu

  11. Huhu Mba Yo, langsung terhenyak baca postingannya. I always like your posts, but this one really touches me. My heart goes out to those kids too.

    Happy belated mother’s day mbak.

  12. Semua orang berhak mendapatkan kebahagiaan dari seorang ibu, entah ibu biologis atau tidak. Tapi bahagia itu hak semua orang. Setuju.
    Salut dengan dirimu, Mbak, tidak semua orang berpikir sampai ke titik seperti ini :)). Selamat Hari Ibu. Maaf ucapannya telat sekali :hehe.

      • Menurut saya, kemampuan pengamatan itu yang harus kita asah supaya bisa lebih mengerti apa yang terjadi dengan sekitar kita, bukan hanya mengenai apa yang berlangsung dalam diri sendiri :)).

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