about me / English

Platonic Relationship

My sister from Jakarta is visiting me right now. She’s the oldest in the family, I am the second, after me there are two younger sisters. Yesterday, we reminisced about our youth including our ex boyfriends. She is two years older than me, we had almost the same circle friends.

We talked about this guy who cheated me once with 2 other girls at the same time, au!!!! His friends told me about the first girl. I found out about the second girl thru my sister’s friend who happened to be a student at the same university where this guy studied (yep, that was what a sister for). This particular guy felt sorry for me when I confronted him that I knew about his affairs. A month later he sent me a letter, asking for forgiveness and begged whether we could move on as friends. Forgive him I could but being friends with him after what he did to me? Nope, nada, rien!!!

I mean, we had never been friends before but lovers, so why this request for friendship?. The attraction was still there at that time and the anger too :-D. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a good contact with my ex-bf now, but I don’t consider this as a friendship. They are guys whom I’ve ever dated.

To make a long story short, I don’t practise Platonic Relationship with hetero men (I have two good male friends, they are both gay). According to moi, a relationship between a man and a woman contains a particular sexual tension, this could decrease with time but won’t totally go away. When a woman has a male hetero friend, the physical attraction would be there I guess.

What do you think about this?


6 thoughts on “Platonic Relationship

  1. I have three male hetero friends and we’re doing ok.

    One of my friends are married and the other two are single but we are good friends as if we were in high schools.

    Although I will be 30 years old, I still think that befriending girls can be a pain in the ass (you don’t know what she’s bitching about behind your back) and boys are more fair, honest and all.

    ….my point is that…it does exist 😀 (although I am a bit skeptical about the whole being friends with an ex kinda thing)

  2. Good for you, I hope these friendships will last long.

    I know that Platonic Friendship (let’s call it this way then) exists but I don’t have one.

  3. I was(and still quite) a tomboy. Most my friends are hetero men. But Ive got several gay bestfriends too, and two good lesbian friends. I guess Im pretty lucky to be able to have it all. There are attraction between me and some male hetero friends, but it doesnt go anywhere as we know we are just friends…

  4. Several of my male hetero friends are married and one or two are , but we had no interest in crossing the line to romance. One is very close to the point we almost be an item but then we realized that we would be better off as friends than lovers. So it is possible to have a platonic relationship for me.

  5. I better not say that I am attracted to my hetero guy friends because if my husband read this comment, then I’ll be in trouble right 😉

    I’d hate it if my husband has a best female friend. And I guess he’d feel the same way. Maybe this reflects insecurity on our marriage, but that’s the way it is, and we’re respecting that (jaga perasaan).

  6. Thanks to you all for sharing.

    @ Rima, you are indeed a lucky girl to have it all. As for the attraction with male hetero friends, I have experienced that one of my male friends fell for me, this after we extensively agreed just to be friends.

    @ you too El, see my answer for Rima.

    @ Katadia, it is not gw jaga perasaan, cause my husband has a married female hetero friend. For me it is now difficult to build a friendship with a man, platonicly due to my experience above (ceritanya een beetje trauma kali ye :-))..

Tell me what you think

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s