Have you ever wondered why you can get along with certain people very well while you can not even stand others? Or that you sometimes have a flash of feeling that you don’t recognize your (best) friends anymore???? Even best friends for years could be strangers to each other. When this happens to you, there’s no reason to feel guilty about it. Friends come and friends go. People change all the time. There are many elements involved which influence character changing or the way one sees things, values etc…. which could lead that best friends can’t get along with each other anymore.
As a foreigner living abroad, it was hard for me in the beginning to make friends. I don’t know how it is in Indonesia now but during my time living there (so before 1995), once you learned to know someone, he or she became your friend automatically. On the other hand, in Dutch you have kennissen = acquintances or friends. Here I have many kennissen and several friends but only 4 are really best friends. These friendships vary a lot, with L I share our interests for culinary, wine & fashion, with J Indonesian stuffs & the meaning of life, W is always available for a laughs while C is a friend for cultural stuffs (literatures, fine and performing art) and career moves. They complete me as I hope I complete them too.
Main question is: why is it more difficult to break up with your (female) best friend than to break up with your boy/girlfriend? It is very hard to say to your friend that you don’t want to see him/her anymore for some reasons. Instead, the easiest way would be chosen; not returning calls, avoiding him/her….until the friendship would fade away….(I did this once and am still ashamed about this!!!!).